III.
It's 3 am and I'm saying things I don't mean,
Oh and I'm meaning things that I don't say.
It should be the other way around but I'm backwards right now,
oh, and nothing makes sense any more--
and common sense has long since gone to bed,
where you should be with me,
and keep me from these nightmares
oh,
but I'm too afraid to tell you,
too afraid.
And I'm too afraid to ask you,
too afraid.
And if it were anytime of day besides right now
I wouldn't be admitting that,
I'm too full of pride.
But Fuck it, right? Fuck it.
And thing is, I don't even want you in that "'love' me for one night till we're both satisfied, be gone in the morning" sort of way.
I don't care if you don't even kiss me, not even just once,
I really don't; I just (really) [truly] just want you,
I want to be in your arms and by your side.

I think, maybe, it's dangerous talking to you at this very moment
Probably really dangerous.
Oh well.
Common sense has long since gone to bed,
I'm running on fumes of gasoline
oh and I've got many miles to go...
So many miles to go
So many miles to go
I just hope that somewhere down the line,
you cross my path and catch me when I fall.


IV.
It's 4 am so I'm rambling
I'mnothinking
I'm barely breathing
oh, and it's much too much fun
being dizzy from the lack of oxygen to my intelligence
forgive me in themorning
and kiss me right now
because
you love how crazy[(cute)]I am
(but it'llneverhappen,no,it'llneverhappen)
I may ramble at 4 am, yeah.
oh, but I'm still too afraid.


V.
At 5 am,
I look at pictures
pictures,
so many pictures
and I think,
probably,
I'm lovesick at 5am,
so I form little crushes,
I think?
Maybe, Idon'tknow.

I just know that I form these silly little infatuations
drizzled with sleep deprivation and hope from a lonely heart
and take them with me under the covers
and cradle them like they're my stuffed animal.

I fall asleep thinking and wake up thinking and live my life thinking and thinking
and in the end I never really end up DOING because I spent my whole day thinking.

In reality I want someone [you] to hold me like their teddy,
like their[your] silly little comfort, like their[your] threadbare shred of security--
And I want to be that for them[you], though, perhaps not so threadbare.
I want to cuddle and be cuddled,
I want to feel like I can give back, too.
I want to be the big spoon, the one with your face on my chest,
the one with my arms around you,
I want to feel big and strong, while still feeling the compliment of your strength
knowing that you're the yin to my yang,
that together,

We're unstoppable.